Agony aunt: Feeling Guilty For Wanting To Leave (From Bucks Free Press)

Agony aunt: Feeling Guilty For Wanting To Leave

11:10am Monday 6th February 2012 in Freetime

Dear Kaye, I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now but over the last 12 months he has put on a huge amount of weight. I feel terribly guilty for saying this but I just don’t find him attractive anymore, he has become lazy and he neglects his personal hygiene.

I want to end the relationship but don’t know what to say. I can’t say it’s because you are overweight. How do I justify leaving him?

Sarah, Downley.

Dear Sarah,

Firstly, no-one can tell you what to say or do, this is a very personal situation that only you can resolve. You don’t have to justify how you feel, just a clear, honest explanation of what your feelings are is what he deserves. Do you think you would feel different if he lost the weight and returned to the man you first knew? You didn’t mention his reasons for weight gain, are they issues that can be resolved? If so, at this time of year there are many classes & weight loss programs that he could try. But, if you have decided the relationship is definitely over then I suggest you treat it as any other break-up. Tell him you feel the relationship has run its path. I’ll leave the finer details to you. Good luck, Regards, Kaye.

KAYE Townsend is a qualified, BACP registered, person-centred counsellor with a private practice in Flackwell Heath, Bucks. She is currently writing a self-help book, write articles for various publications & work as a volunteer counsellor for a local charity.