KAYE Townsend is a qualified, BACP registered, person-centred counsellor with a private practice in Flackwell Heath, Bucks.

She is currently writing a self-help book, write articles for various publications & work as a volunteer counsellor for a local charity.

Here she answers letters in her Bucks Free Press agony aunt column.

 

 Dear Kaye,

My sister has started dating my ex-boyfriend. We split just before Christmas after 2 years together & the emotions are still quite raw as I didn’t want to split up, it was his choice. I don’t know how I should feel about it but I know it makes my relationship with my sister very difficult.

We both live at home with Mum so obviously the idea of him coming to the house makes feel very uncomfortable. My sister says that as we broke up over 3 months ago, it’s in the past & she doesn’t see why I feel awkward.

My Mum agrees with me & has said that for the time being he shouldn’t come to the house. I feel betrayed as I used to confide in her, especially when I was going through the brake up.

Am I over-reacting?

Danielle, 22,

Wycombe.

Dear Danielle,

This must be bringing up so many emotions for you so I’m not surprised you feel unsure if you are justified in feeling hurt & uncomfortable with the situation. Think how you would feel if a friend did this, you would be angry at her for seeing him, knowing how you feel.

All women know there is an unwritten rule about these situations & 3 months is nothing compared to the heartache you feel. I’m afraid the same rule applies to your sister.

I think you will find that no woman would see this as anything than wrong. Meanwhile, point out to her, what kind of guy would see his ex’s sister so soon after the split? Sounds like the type that would be at home on the Jeremy Kyle show!

You can do better Danielle,

all the best,

Kaye.

Sadly, my time here has come to an end, so I would like to thank all of you for your letters & support over the last 18 months & wish you all the best for the future, Kaye.