Tories narrowly beat Lib Dems in BFP poll (From Bucks Free Press)

• "Well, the polls have now opened and from my window I can see hundreds of people scurrying along the road, eager to register their vote.
  I am sure that there will talk of little else today as "Election Fever" hits each and every one of us.
  ~
  The undecided are still trying to make up their minds as they join the queues at the polling stations.
  Do I vote for the good looking one?
  Do I not vote for his party because he was educated at Eton?
  Shall I do what I do for the Grand National and take my lucky pin along to stick randomly in the ballot sheet?
  ~
  Further down the road I can see small groups of children crying as they realize that their school is not going to be used as a polling station and they must go in today.
  ~
  The streets are still awash with the detritus of political campaigning. The election leaflets with their mixture of fact, fiction, gossip and innuendo flutter about in the breeze. I can see several trampled rosettes with the party names peeling back to reveal their original use - "Best in Breed" and "Walk and Trot Champion Pony".
  ~
  Small animals and birds have come out of hiding to feast themselves on the on the mixture of egg and flour left behind by the more enthusiastic of political activists. They will need to hurry as soon it will be washed away by the tears of those whose vote was to no avail.
  ~
  There is a commotion at one polling station. Has one of the candidates turned up to cast their vote? No. It is just a problem caused by the caretaker of the scout hut failing to unlock the toilets. Several elderly people can be seen hopping around from one leg to the other in desperation - and that cannot be good for the hip replacement.
  ~
  Some of the shops have opened early to cater for the rush of people who are expected to stock up for the all-night vigil that is the live results programme on the television. There are special offers on "Dimbleby Packs" (Two bananas, a Mars bar and two litres of Red Bull.)
  ~
  Thousands of people are gathering outside Parliament with sleeping bags and camping chairs, each wanting to be at the front of the crowd so that they will have a good view in case there is a hung parliament. Bookmakers in their Trilbys and with their small blackboards are making odds on who will be hung first.
  ~
  By Sunday it will all be over. We will have a new Government. The "winners" will be hollering and whooping in their excitement. However, there will follow that sudden realization that they are now expected to do something about the mess that is Great Britain.
  What will their response be?
  They'll smile a wry smile and say to themselves "Who cares ... I'm alright Jack."
  ~
  And what about us, the people?
  We'll have to do it all again and a few years time, in the full knowledge that it won't make a ha'penth of difference."
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