THE laughable incompetence of Tesco was the reason for me looking bleary-eyed and hung-over on Tuesday morning.

We constantly hear on the news how it is the biggest supermarket group in the country.

If that's so, then why does it appear to have no adequate back-up when a grocery delivery van breaks down?

I had to go out to Loudwater at 11pm on Monday to collect our week's supplies after Tesco rang to say it couldn't deliver an order booked two days earlier.

The store's online service called during the day on Monday to say a van was out of action and the delivery had to be rearranged. I didn't pick up the call until the evening and we had no food or nappies left in the house.

I rang Tesco to plead for something to be done that night, but was told it was impossible.

The store had taken a decision that day to cancel around 20 orders, I was told, because there was no back-up van for my round.

I was offered an alternative time the following day, but that was unacceptable because we needed the stuff immediately.

Mrs Editor's Chair had placed the order on Saturday night, spending almost two hours picking her way through Tesco.com's internet site.

This had allowed us to spend the Sunday out at a farm rather than going grocery shopping.

We were relying on the Monday night order and had no reason to suspect a major business such as Tesco would be so pathetic when this time had been agreed.

As a result, I had to rush off at 11pm and collect masses of stuff, while Mrs Editor's Chair baby-sat. I didn't get to bed until 2am.

Okay, not the world's worst sob story, I admit. At least the store was open late at night.

But it is a cautionary tale about: a) the illusion that the internet makes for the best and most efficient way to live your life; and b) that these giant stores should never be allowed too much of a monopoly.

Point a): Everyone assumes that just because the web is so sophisticated and ingenious, the service given will be the same. Not so, judging from this.

Point b): The news that Sainsbury's and Asda are bidding for Safeway bodes ill for us all. The more the market narrows, the more the big boys can afford to give inadequate service.

Tesco was very polite but ultimately refused to help me that night even though I pleaded I had no provisions for a small child.

It wasn't the store's fault its van didn't work, but it is its fault that it doesn't appear to have an acceptable back-up for these emergencies.

I'd now put more faith in the little corner store at the end of my road.

A Tesco spokesperson told The Star: "There are four vans which operate from the Henley site which is responsible for deliveries to my home in Wycombe. On Monday, one van broke down and is being repaired at the moment.

"It's very rare that vans do break down. We do keep them regularly maintained and serviced. But like all mechanical things, vans can have problems."

Tesco added: "The vast majority of customers got their deliveries delivered.

"Customers were phoned to see if they wanted to alter the delivery time or if they preferred to cancel.

"There are four vans operating from the Henley site with no immediate plans to expand."

January 22, 2003 19:00