Beauty before age

THERE'S nothing like the death of a royal to bring out the hypocrisy and humbug in people, particularly royal reporters.

There has been a wholly unattractive and gloating note in the coverage of Princess Margaret's death. I heard a BBC royal reporter refer to her as having a 'chequered past'. I take this to refer to the fact that she had an affair (oh no), smoked (shock) and drank (horror) and seemed to have been unhappy at some stages in her life.

I have no particular feeling about the Princess, beyond a natural feeling of sympathy for anyone who has died.

What I object to is the smarmy comparisons with Princess Di. We have heard the glee with which it has been reported how the floral tributes were so much less, how the crowds were so much fewer and how royal engagements would continue.

When Diana died the nation was supposedly plunged into mourning, yet was she really so different to Margaret? Wasn't her past equally chequered, if we choose to describe things in that way? I seem to remember that she also had an affair.

The plain fact is that she was younger and more attractive at the time she died than Princess Margaret. There is nothing more than ageism to the unfair comparisons between them.

Not easy listening

IT may be Valentine's Day this week, but love was certainly not in the air between me and a certain young woman at a music gig at the weekend.

I had gone with a friend to hear a pretty good band play. The said woman on the other hand seemed to have gone to listen to the sound of her own voice.

"This is really soulful," she shouted during a particulary quiet song. I think she only stopped talking to clap at the end of each song. She would wait for another to start and then start rabbiting on about how great the band was.

You could imagine her stopping in the middle of sex to tell you that she was having a really good time. Like living life with instant footnotes.

Driven crazy

I am gratified that the launch last week of the Straight Talking Motoring Moron of the Week competition has proved such a success.

In their eagerness to compete for this week's prize (a supply of herbal bath salts), drivers have been behaving worse than ever on the roads. It is amazing how willing they are to risk life and limb for my prize, but there you are.

This week's winner is the strange person in the dark blue Rover who at around 8am yesterday gave a boost to the blood pressure of so many of us by driving at 20 miles an hour in a 40mph area. For such determined idiocy ma'am, you are the Straight Talking Motoring Moron of the Week.

I

February 14, 2002 13:38