DEFIANT mayor Jane White marched into my office and shampoo’d my hair on Friday in an outrageous attempt to force me to go into the stocks at a Bank Holiday fun day.

High Wycombe’s first citizen was appalled last week to read I was unable to attend, and have sponges thrown at me, at the August 30 event because I was spending the day washing my hair.

I explained in last week’s column that I needed to be at home for the entire Bank Holiday, one of my few days off from work, to ensure my epic grey locks were properly washed.

A feeble excuse, perhaps, but one I thought would surely get me out of having to be humiliated at the fun day at Totteridge Community Centre.

The day the column was published, Jane rebuked me in an email, saying: “Be the man that we all know you are and stand up and take the punishment that you volunteered yourself for!”

I took the mature way out – and ignored it, hoping it would all go away.

But I hadn’t reckoned on the determination of our mayor who first stormed into our HQ in Loudwater on Friday and then led me to the sink where she proceeded to give me a shampoo.

Unfortunately, there were no bottles of Head and Shoulders to hand so she had to make do with good old fashioned washing-up liquid.

But now my hair has been washed, I am left frantically looking for excuses to get out of the stocks stunt.

I’ll give a customary useless Backchat prize to the reader who sends me in the best excuse I can use for avoiding a mayor’s invitation to an event. Email me at scohen@ london.newsquest.co.uk or write to me at Loudwater Mill, Station Road, High Wycombe, Bucks, HP10 9TY.